The Cruelty Of The Curbside Cab Line

Few things bring out New Yorkers’ lesser selves than the Penn Station taxi line during an Easter downpour. It’s also one of just a few scenarios capable of adding insult the injury of a late train and an exhausted ten-month-old. We were nearly three-hours behind on a one-hour trip by the time we stepped off…

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Learning To Walk Again

Maggie took her first, tentative steps last week, slowly, deliberately and clumsily wobbling across the bedroom from her startled mother to her amazed father. She waved like a homecoming queen to steady herself, then collapsed on her bottom. Abbi and I were flabbergasted. Maggie was nonplussed. Still, it was a colossal milestone for all of…

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Bears Have Thick Fur

When I woke up, the sheets were peeled back, my wife was gone, and in her place a small, toy bear was blurting out to the blurry, inky night, “I’m a bear!” Abbi burst into the room. “It just turned itself on,” she said in a whispered-frenzy. “And it won’t turn off! Maggie’s wide awake…

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SXSW: Serendipity, Baby

The best things that happened at SXSW were the least-expected. Like bumping into then recruiting a former colleague to join me at a live taping Marc Maron’s hilarious “WTF” podcast (where he called the seminal music fest, “The Hipster Alamo”). Or wandering into the premiere of “Outside Industry: The Story Of SXSW,” a fantastic documentary…

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Neil Diamond’s Sequin-Spangled America

I was way out on the edge of The Bronx when the ominous sound of cellos rose in my headphones. The New York City skyline was like Oz in the razor-wire distance, miles beyond the massive, concrete Bruckner Expressway, past fields of industrial oil storage tanks, rows of rusted railroad tracks and blocks and blocks…

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When A Moment Changes Everything

For weeks now, I’ve been listening to David Gray’s “When A Moment Changes Everything” on near-repeat fully expecting to get hit by a bus, pushed in front of a subway, or catch a stray bullet at any instant. It’s a simple, hooky, perfectly David Gray kinda’ song with a propellant beat, ascending melody, and the…

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The Downside Of The Applause Meter

Last week, I volunteered to participate in a video testimonial shoot for a well-known suite of software that provides real-time web metrics: unique visits, page views, video streams, etc. Yes, I love the camera. I enjoy talking about my job. And I appreciate the ability to gauge and measure success. But I had an ulterior…

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My Sunshine

Difficult to tell for sure, but I think today’s the day it clicked for Maggie. “Oh, that sound I keep hearing from the speakers is Daddy.” Maggie’s a handfull. I mean, she’s actually quite fun: short on tears, long on giggles and squeals. But she’s super-curious and uber-wobbly. Maggie’s primary passtime is unloading her bookshelf…

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Living In The Fish-Eyed Lens, Part II

I was in the frozen food section, just a few aisled off course in the neighborhood Food Emporium (list: coffee, half & half), when I remembered. “You’re not a Juice Head,” Snooki said. “You’re a Lean Cuisine.” More than 48 hours after the Grammy red carpet closed, it’s still coming back to me. “MTV News’…

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Nothing Is Cool

“Are you cool?” The year is 1996, and — while I’ve finally ditched my pleather pants, green lame shirt and blue fingernail polish — I most definitely am not. Nightengale Bar is sparsely-populated. My band, Benjamin Wagner Deluxe, is set up in front of a mirrored wall and killing time before our enviable set time…

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