Warning: Candy Canes Create Crazy (Adorable) Kids
Like most decisions, it was made quickly and without any sense of ramifications.
Fast forward three hours.
The air is filled with the sound of Christmas music, and the smell of baking cookies. Candlelight casts warmth across a room full of familiar faces.
Down the hall, five adorable children under five-years-old are bouncing on our bed, tickling one another, diving under a pile of coats, and hiding beneath a bundle of lily-white pillows. Limbs are flying. Laughter explodes. Their parents peer from the living room disapproving.
“It’s spithy!” Edward says.
His lips and cheeks are streaked red. His fingers are sticky. A stream of pink, syrupy saliva trickles from the corner of his smiling mouth. Seconds later, the peppermint stick falls to the parquet floor and shatters into a thousand tiny, red-and-white candy shards.
Across the living room, Ethan dips his entire fist into a paper cup of milk, licks his candy cane clean, and repeats.
Our 750 square foot apartment crackles with manic, sugar-fueled, childhood energy: running, giggling, leaping and wrestling. It is unbridled, unmanageable, unyielding. A full glass of red wine topples, shatters, and explodes on the sisal rug. For an instant, the action pauses, then resumes.
Bing Crosby and David Bowie croon from the stereo.
I pray my wish will come true
For my child and your child too
He’ll see the day of glory
See the day when men of good will
Live in peace, live in peace again
I flash back to the kitchen, where Abbi stood on her tip toes, reached for the top shelf, and pulled down a blue, red-and-white tin of King Leo Candy Sticks.
“Should we put these candy canes out for the party?”
Pure Sugar, Corn Syrup, Pure Peppermint Oil, FD&C Red #40.
“Sure,” I reply. “What’s the harm?”
Apparently, I have a lot to learn about parenting.
A Special “Holiday” Offer On Behalf Of The Kids
I watch the news. I appreciate that times are tough. And I read the blogs, so I know that few people buy CDs anymore.
Still, lemme make one final appeal to you on behalf of kids in Brooklyn who need somewhere safe to go after school, and wanna’ learn how to write (coming from a grown up who was once a kid who wanted to learn how to write).
If you haven’t snapped up a copy of our new charity CD, “A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II,” here’s some added incentive. Order before December 15 and you’ll automatically be entered to win a copy of “A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” CD signed by each of the eleven contributors, plus signed copies of each of our most-recent releases. That’s twelve CDs in all!
Click here to order from CDBaby.
“A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” is a brand-new holiday compilation featuring some of New York City’s finest emerging artists plus our collective cover of “Happy XMas (War Is Over).” The eleven-track recording features Chris Abad (“Last Christmas”), Kelley McRae (“Winter Wonderland”), Bryan Dunn (“Father Christmas”), Deena Goodman (“Ma’ Otzur”), yours truly (“Blue Christmas”), and more.
All proceeds from will be donated to 826NYC, a nonprofit organization dedicated to supporting students ages 6-18 with their creative and expository writing skills. Please contribute to this very special cause. Happy Holidays!
Love, Benjamin
P.S. – Makes a great gift!
The Band Goes Commando (Or, The 40-Year-Old Virgin’s Laser-Sighted Paintball Gun)
It was an unusual text message, even for 8:41 on a Friday night.
“Man up, son!”
Ends up Chris Abad’s little bother, Gabe, was celebrating his fifteenth birthday on Saturday by gathering a few friends downwind from a landfill to pepper one other with gunfire. Paintball bullets, but still.
“Tony and Jamie are coming,” Chris followed. “Think of it as a team building exercise for the band!”
I was enticed by the invitation, sure. What guy doesn’t want to spend an afternoon rolling around in mud and leaves taking potshots at his pals? But it was the end of worst work-week ever. I was fighting a chest cold. And the apartment was teaming with dirty clothes, dirty dishes, and the detritus of this week’s “A Holiday Benefit” release.
Rare is the day when I pass up an invitation to do dude stuff (see also: NASCAR), so — after careful consultation with the wife — I texted him back. And began planning to wake up early.
* * *
The Staten Island Paintball Center is a 300-acre complex of scrappy woods bordered to the north by the Staten Island Salt & Gravel Center, to the east by massive oil storage tanks, to the south by Fresh Kills Land Fill, and to west by Arthur Kill Correctional Facility.
“Come for the paintball, stay for the black lung!” Chris cracked.
The place is basically two rectangular, red-metal shipping crates dividing a gravel parking lot from 300+ acres of mesh fence-lined playing fields. In between, there’s a few rows of picnic tables around a fire pit. Maybe it was the dozens of white kids in black masks, but it felt like a pretty good place for some sort of Arian Supremacist meeting.
Kidding.
Anyway, we had a great time slogging around in the mud, taking shots at each other. Not surprisingly, Tony, Jamie, Chris and I banded together. We developed some semblance of strategy over the course of the afternoon, but never posed much of a threat. Chris’s cousin-in-laws, Fernando and Craig, though, were formidable opponents. And young Gabe — who no doubt spends hours playing first-person shooter video games, and could run twice as fast as any of the thirty-year-olds — kicked all of our asses.
What was most surprising about the whole thing, frankly, was the well-developed subculture of paintballers. These kids (and a few rogue adults) were clearly not weekend warriors. There’s serious gear: baggy, padded jumpsuits, reinforced gloves, special goggles and guns. They had it all. And aspired to more.
One fortysomething Asian guy offered a troublingly enthused and informed show-and-tell of his “MilSim” painball Uzi with a laser sight. One seventeen-year-old aspired unironically to a paintball-equipped Apache helicopters.
“Dude,” he said in a thick Staten Island accents, “It’s awesome.”
And once you get over the fact that your pointing a gun at another human being and enjoying it, and realize that — when the camera is pointed your way — you’re unconsciously striking the same pose as all those photos you’ve seen from Iraq, it is fun. Which is weird.
Still, I didn’t think about work for almost four hours.
And by the last round (some of which you can watch below), I kinda’ knew what I was doin’. Or thought I did, at least until a big, blue paintball hit me square between the eyes.
‘Tis The Season
My pal Ron Lieber writes the “Your Money” column for The New York Times. It’s a great gig for a smart guy, especially for these trying times.
Ron periodically canvasses his “e-mail focus group” for feedback and insight on his ideas. Last week, for example, he inquired after first-time house buyers. A few weeks ago, he inquired thusly about the frenzied gift giving season:
I’m wearying of the search for the right gift for a double digit (and growing) number of family members each year. Even more than worrying about spending the money, which is in shorter supply for lots of people right now, I’d rather spend my increasingly limited spare time hanging out with those closest to me than using that time to shop for each one of them, you know?
You, however, may have better ideas (or improvements to mine), or may find meaning in the gift hunt that I don’t. I’d love to hear what you’re thinking and what your family does. Also, has the economic situation changed your feelings about any of this?
I replied thusly:
Being that a) my parents are divorced and b) I’m married, I’m part of a few different families with a few different approaches. Some gift as they wish to receive. And some gift at (apparent) random. But my favorite is the old-fashioned list.
Sure, it’s a little less exciting for Abbi to open something for which she asked, but it beats her opening something she doesn’t like and faking it. In terms of receiving, the holidays are one of two times a year where I don’t have to do something for myself. Even if it’s something I would do for myself (I ask for things like sweaters and running gear; stuff I need, nothing too crazy), the whole transaction is lighter when someone else is doing it for you. A list is less serendipitous, and maybe a tony bit less meaningful, but also less risky. There’s still an element of surprise and levity, but not that embarassment of “Ohhh… this. Gee… thanks.”
To your question of the meaning of it all, though, our now-annual “Holiday Benefit” cd/show is the very best of the season. Because to me — despite what I’ve said above about getting stuff — the spirit of Christmas to me is one of unconditional giving, of going beyond one’s self, of looking out for each other. That’s what the benefit does. It’s about community, and charity, and joy, song and light.
They’re kind of separate impulses, frankly. Who doesn’t love to get stuff? But who doesn’t love to GIVE stuff? I wish I didn’t want. But I do.
So what do I want for Christmas this year? Thanks for asking. Here’s my list — meaningless and meaningful, perhaps, in equal turns.
J Crews Pinwhale-Cord Spot Coat (L)
J Crew Merino Wool Navy V-Neck Sweater (L)
Banana Republic Gray V-Neck Sweater (L)
Banana Republic Navy V-Neck Sweater (L)
Cisco Brewers Classic Black Baseball Cap
Gray Vince Cashmere Zip Hoodie
Nike Dri-FIT Full-Zip Men’s Hoodie (Dark Gray)
Nike Distance Split Leg Men’s Running Shorts (Anthracite)
Nike Tempo Men’s Track Shorts (L)
Nike Dri-FIT Filament Men’s Running Tights (L)
Nike + Feather Weight Utility Jacket (L)
Nike Lightweight Running Gloves
Framed/Matted I Love This Song Print by Exploding Dog
Framed/Matted I Like This Music Print by Exploding Dog
Framed/Matted Lloyd Dobler Print by Elloh
Framed/Matted Bob Dylan Print by Elloh
Framed/Matted Johnny Cash Print by Elloh
“33 1/3: U2′s ‘Achtung Baby’” by Stephen Catanzarite
“33 1/3: Bruce Springsteen’s ‘Born In The USA’” by Geoffrey Himes
For the record, if you could toss World Peace, Economic Prosperity and Social Equality, that’d be cool.
And if you’re still feeling gracious after all that, I’d still like to be on the cover of Rolling Stone Magazine.
Happy Holidays!
“A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” Takes Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
A few years ago now, I returned to my alma mater, Syracuse University, to speak to students about how to get a job (or, more specifically, how I got my job, and lessons I’ve learned that might be of some valuable to them).
It’s a speech I would later give at Emerson College, and have adapted and re-presented to various internship and graduate programs since. In fact, I’ll be dusting it off this Monday night.
Anyway, I addressed three separate classrooms that day before driving past my band’s house (“The Smokehouse”) to the hill high above campus, taking in my life so far, and heading to the airport.
At the end of the last class, an assertive, ambitious senior named Ralphie Aversa sprinted down the aisle and pressed a glossy folder full of press clips, CDs and glamour shots into my hands. The kid wanted to be on MTV. Badly.
Ralphie (or “Little” Ralphie as he was know on his local radio show then) has done a great job working that first contact ever since, peppering me with email and phone calls. I’ve offered all sorts of agenda-informed advice, like that the world doesn’t need another Ryan Seacrest, and that he should focus on being a great storyteller.
He’s since landed at a Top 40 station, WBHT, in Scranton, Pennsylvania, launched his own blog, and focused on his reportage skills after hours.
A few weeks ago, then, it dawned on me that he might do me a solid and spin our “A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” single, “Happy Xmas (War Is Over).” He kindly obliged, and tossed in a quick interview to boot.
We spoke around eight o’clock Wednesday night. It had been a long, excruciating day (which lead, sadly, to a longer and even more excruciating day on Thursday). I turned away from my desk, put my feet up on the window sill, looked out on Times Square, and found some easy enthusiasm.
It was, as always, an interesting conversation. I know enough about media to appreciate a good sound bite, but still caught myself rambling. Fortunately, Ralphie knows enough about media to edit. Here’s the interview, complete with ear-splitting, Top 40 Radio sound effects.
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If you haven’t already, please download your copy of “A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” at iTunes, or have our friends at CD Baby send you an actual CD. If you want to order more than ten (makes a great gift!), please email me directly.
And to Ralphie, WBHT, and Wilkes-Barre, thanks, and Happy Holidays.
“A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” Release – Photos
December 2nd, 2008
“A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” In Sixty Seconds
Listen, I know I’m prone to hyperbole, but last night’s Rebel Spirit Music Presents: A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” album release party was hands-down the single-most meaningful, beautiful and excellent artistic and community-oriented thing of which I’ve ever been a part.
There wasn’t a bad apple in the bunch. And were I not a) exhausted, b) due at the office in eighteen minutes or c) still wearing last night’s torn jeans and tuxedo shirt, I’d tell you all about it.
So here are the headlines:
The musicians killed it. I’ve never seen a more talented and passionate group of performers in one room, and — more importantly, perhaps — never seen more cross-pollination, cameos, and collaboration.
The silent auction drew some two thousand dollars in bids. The big item? The “A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” guitar signed by all of the performers. Thanks Chris Abad for the great idea!
And we sold about sixty CDs. Which means we’ve paid off the manufacturing. So we still have CDs to sell. And we’d still appreciate your support. The holidays aren’t over yet. Heck they’ve barely just begun!
So please download your copy at iTunes (and what the heck, leave a review!) or have our friends at CD Baby send you an actual CD. If you want to order more than ten (makes a great gift!), please email me directly.
See all of the “Rebel Spirit Presents: A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II” photos here.
Canal Room (New York, New York)
Live Forever
Blue Christmas
Merry Christmas, Baby
Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)
Happy Xmas (War Is Over)
“A Holiday Benefit, Volume II” LP Release!!!
Download your copy at iTunes (and what the heck, leave a review!) or have our friends at CD Baby send you an actual CD.
See the photos from the “A Holiday Benefit, Volume II” release party here.
“Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” Video Premiere
I like Christmas well enough, but what I really love are Christmas songs.
“Do They Know It’s Christmas” rocked my brace-faced, junior high world. I bought the single, and raced home from Tredyffrin-Easttown Middle School every afternoon to catch the video on MTV.
In high school, my brother, Chris, and I used to drive around suburban Philadelphia looking for luminaria-strewn neighborhoods listening to “A Very Special Christmas” at full blast.
That’s Christmas to me. Keep your Berl Ives and Bing Crosby. Give me my yuletide cheer with amplification, distortion, and drums. Give me Sinatra, Elvis, and Aretha. Give me Springsteen, Run DMC, and U2. Heck, I can even get into Bryan Adam’s “Run, Run Rudolph.”
I released my first Christmas EP in 2003. It was the first thing I recorded with Kevin Anthony (who later went on to produce “Almost Home” and “Love & Other Indoor Games”). The a-side was a solo, acoustic performance of “Happy Xmas (War Is Over).”
Like last year’s “A Family Holiday Benefit,”, “A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II”, is part Band Aid, and part “A Very Special Christmas.” In addition to ten great, rockin’ original and cover tunes, our a-side is an all-star cover of John Lennon’s “Happy Xmas (War Is Over).”
We recorded an all-star singer/songwriter version at Jeffrey Swart and Kyle Paas’ Kingsland Studios a few months ago. Everybody was there: Chris and Casey, Jamie and Tony, Kelley McRae, Brent Shuttleworth, Deena Goodman, and many, many more cool folks. My esteemed colleague and pal, Jonathan Goldner, was there capturing all the fun on DV. And while we were all eating turkey, he was making us a music video. Have a look.
Tonight I come full circle. “Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” is the grand finale of our big charity rock show, “Rebel Spirit Music Presents: A Holiday Benefit, Vol. II.” Hope you’ll come down to Canal Room (285 W Broadway), or pick up a copy of the CD here or on iTunes.
And if you’re interested, here’s my far less interesting version from way back in 2003:
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